There's so much happening in our world that we often feel we have no control over any of it.
Family Health Politics
We hope those that we ask to represent us do their job well, but most of the time we end up disappointed. So, we feel like we have no voice. I want you to know that there is always something in your life you have full control over, even if it's just your attitude about the situation.
One of the first things I had to discover was myself when my divorce left me broke and broken. I no longer knew Tanya. I lost basics about myself like my favorite color and my favorite flower. I was so focused on my husband’s desires and the kids’ desires that I stopped looking at my own desires. I stop sharing things that I really wanted to have in my life because we are often made to believe it's selfish to consider ourselves and consider our thoughts.
When you have a giving heart and are sensitive to the needs of others, you find it difficult to stop accommodating the needs of everyone else. You are comfortable with finding fault within yourself even if you did not do anything wrong. You come up with quick cliche responses like “no problem,” don’t worry about it,” or “it’s probably me,” so others can feel ok.
Here are a few things you can do to move past your comfort zone.
Reset your environment
The divorce put me in so much financial devastation that I couldn’t afford to move. My credit score went from 736 down to 526. I no longer wanted my home to be a constant reminder of the ex, but I had no financial means to make any major adjustments. I started by rearranging some of the furniture. Just moving the furniture to different locations was a quick reset to my environment. I also repurposed my bed covering. I placed my beautiful duvet over the couch, tucked and tapered it in a few spots, and it looked like a new couch. That simple change cost me nothing, but it changed everything.
2. Reset your thoughts
Resetting my environment helped me to reset my thoughts. I was no longer going to allow myself to feel like I was a victim. Granted this is not an overnight journey. The first couple of months after my divorce I could not do anything. It took everything in me to just get out of bed. Once I decided to just make up my bed, I found the willpower to rearrange the furniture. That willpower helped me to take the time to rediscover the amazing qualities I brought to the table. My loving, helpful, caring nature was an inner strength I needed to embrace for myself and others.
3. Reset your habits
That resolve to embrace the new thoughts I had about myself allowed me to create a new foundation that supported me and my children. I created a routine that helped me to implement good habits. A good routine can give you room to focus on other areas of your life.
There’s so much more to discuss, but these will get you started. If want someone to join you on the journey, inbox me. You can move past your comfort zone and create what you need to be whole. Just do one step at a time consistently, even if it's small.