Do you remember your first day of high school, when you walked into the gym or the auditorium for your introductory assembly? Either way, when you arrived you looked around at the brand-new faces trying to see who could possibly become your friend. You looked in every direction to see who you could connect with. While you sat there thinking of all these things, you see someone with a big smile on their face, a smile so inviting that it just draws you in. That is the moment that you realize, you just met your new BFF.
I met my best friend back in high school. She's full of life and everybody seemed to go to her because she was the one that always took control of a situation and made certain that things were going to be OK. It was because of her inspiration that I pressed through the sleep-deprived moments after taking on three jobs to save up enough money so that I could get my degree. It was because of her strength that I managed the chaos and trauma that erupted in the aftermath of my divorce. It was also her that stood in the gap for me encouraging me to reach my dreams and goals. She was the one that said, “You cannot stop here. This is not the moment to lay down and die.”
Do you have somebody like that in your life? A person you can go to if you need encouragement, inspiration, and motivation. If you don't, I encourage you to find someone because everybody needs someone in their corner that can inspire them to be their best and comfort them when they're in their worst moments.
If you are that person for everybody else, who cheers for you? Who encourages and inspires you when life comes to knock you down? Sometimes the encourager has to encourage themselves. Sometimes the inspirer has to inspire themselves, but usually, they have no idea how to do that.
So, here are a few things that can help you in this situation:
Be present in the moment. Assess how you feel and how you got there. That awareness will give you a moment to quickly restore harmony or take action that will make things better.
Know your conflict sequence. When you know your conflict sequence, it gives you an idea of how to step out of that moment of conflict and move into a direction of achieving the goals that you already desire. You will become more cognizant of some triggers and some clues. The faster you become aware of what stage you are in when you enter your conflict sequence, the faster you will be able to eliminate conflict.
Communicate what you need. I often provide a communication strategy to help those that need an effective way of communicating their needs. Each strategy is unique to the individual and their conflict sequence.
Knowing this simple solution can help you focus on being the support system you desire while empowering those around you. If you would like someone to support you along the journey, reach out to me. I would love to be a support system to you so you can be the best support system for others.